How exactly did you become a spinster, dear?

[catelin]

I had lunch (work-related) the other day with group of people...you know, the kind who remind you of Mr. Howell and Lovey on Gilligan's Island. They were talking about a wedding that I'm not invited to--evidently a big social event, the joining of two very big political families. I don't know about elsewhere, but these kinds of "arranged" marriages do still happen here. Then came the Bridget Jones moment. One of the frilly pink ladies turned to me and said, "Well, I think we can all be safe betting that Cate won't ever marry." There was a bit of twittering laughter after that...they're like a bunch of turkeys, these people...one starts gobbling and they all have to make some kind of noise. I simply smiled demurely and said, "Why marry when you can simply take a lover?" It was perfect. Same effect as if I'd said, "Why marry when I'm busy fucking all of your husbands?" Of course, I'm not. Fucking their husbands, that is. I sat through the rest of the lunch wondering, though, have I missed something? See, I'm one of those ninnies that's holding out for Big Love. Not that I haven't had plenty of Little Love along the way. But you get married for Big Love. That I don't know what it feels like but I'll know it when I feel it Love. Even when I've wanted Little Loves to be the Big Love...I knew. Which is why I'm still holding out. And with all the talk about beaded gowns and what style of veil and who's catering, it just seemed a bit insane to me. I've watched so many of my friends get married just because they felt it was "time" or that the idea of Big Love was foolish---mostly, they just got tired of waiting to have a wedding. Shit, I find Big Love and my "wedding" can be licking our palms and giving each other a whooping high five for all I care! The eyes of these people, these frightened, lonely men and women who gave up on Big Love a long time ago, make me sad. Turkeys. Depressing.

Comments

We should all be DJ Spinster

[jourdannex.livejournal.com]

I found your journal via a friends weblink. I am glad I did.

I loved this entry.

Who are these people who cackle amongst themselves at tables and why do they feel the need to state these things out loud? Are they feeling it was clever or are they just insecure?

It very much feels like they just *live* for the wedding as a party, a reason to cater, to get the gown, and not for the bigger picture.

These people are sheep, we should make shearling coats out of the lot of them.

I always think secretly these *are* the people who settled for Mr/Mrs Right Now instead of Mr/Mrs Right and they will not be happy until all of us are in the same sad little dinghy...with a minivan and tract home and time share.

They deserve to be sitting there thinking "hey, is that single woman at our table the reason my husband is smiling these days?"

Re: We should all be DJ Spinster

[catelin.livejournal.com]

A friend's weblink? I'm curious now...where from? Anyway, welcome welcome to my crazy life. Thanks for saying hello! : )

Re: We should all be DJ Spinster

[jourdannex.livejournal.com]

Thank you for having me :)

I found the link at my very good friend Jan's website actually. And very pleased that I did find it.