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We met online a couple of years ago. We were both lurking in a poetry chatroom and he struck up a conversation. I was never that good at the chatroom thing. I didn't have the patience for the tiresome questions about my age, marital status, sexual preference...I'm sure you know the drill. He was different, though. He didn't ask me the stupid questions. He called himself "Custard Brain" and that made me chuckle. It was so....anti-suave, you know? He was smart. More than that; he was clever. He had a wit, a razor sharp wit and a way with words that still leaves me dazzled each time I have mail from him. We spent hours talking to one another about everything and nothing. It was one of those rare connections that people make, even when they are face-to-face. It wasn't about flirting; it wasn't about sex; it wasn't about anything but being friends. We were so stupid sometimes that I'd have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. But it was that good kind of stupid...that kind that you can only share with the people you trust.
I never thought about it until later; but from the moment I met him, I knew, without any doubt at all, that we were going to mean something very important to each other. That our connection was going to have a significance that would outlast any infatuation with certain sites or virtual meeting places. I was right, you know. He is the reason for so many of the things that I've done. He liked my writing. He was the first person, other than my best girlfriend, to tell me that I had some talent...and that I should keep writing. Even when other's reactions to my stories were lukewarm, he would gently nudge me into continuing. Most of what I wrote wouldn't have been written if it weren't for him. The literary site that I created would not have ever existed if it weren't for him. I would not be writing this here if it weren't for him. I love him in a profoundly, intensely personal way...if there are soul mates, then I have no doubt he is one of mine. It goes so far beyond anything physical, and yet I can almost feel myself tethered to him by the heartstrings from across an ocean. I almost never comment on his journal entries because it's awkward having to share him with others; as I'm sure it is for him to share me. We are both so busy that we hardly have time for more than the occasional "Hey, just checking to make sure you're still alive" email. I have never seen him in person; I'm not sure if I ever will....but it makes no difference to me. I see him. I see him every day, in everything that I do. His name is Val...and he calls me "Cate of the Deserts" and "Cate-o" and all sorts of other wonderful silly names. I am breaking the silence and sharing some of our secrets because I just wanted him to know that things are very much as they were in that joyful beginning we had...and as they shall always be.
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That is beautiful!
The opening of a heart...
Happiness....
~Deb
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wonderful
I love this.
I love this.
freaking astounding. herein lies the real meat of why this internet revolution is so incredibly important to us as humans. new ways to communicate -- ways that offer opportunity to completely disintegrate walls, to let people know you in ways that are so difficult because of the physical social hardwiring. people aren't constrained to who they can meet and appeal to terrestrially... the minds can meet -- as they should! children now aren't stuck with the people down their block for friends -- they have this intuitive medium to really explore what they're *really* about, to get real information on all these confusing feelings, validation that it's not wrong to be unlike the people at school.
and this -- this sort of thing... people who could have never, ever met making a difference in each other's lives. a tremendous difference! life changing! life enhancing! opportunities for personal evolution that have never been there before. this is evolution. this is amazing.
i'm filled, *filled* i tell you, *consumed* with happiness for this new world we're moving into, for you two. more of this should be happening.
in fact, more of this is. many, many really important people in my life were found this way. one of my best friends *ever*, and the girl I love, so many more...
*smile*
I'm so happy to read this, thank you *so* much for sharing.
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goodlordgoodlordgoodlordgoodlordgoodlord!
...
my. oh. my!!
myohmyohmyohmyohmyohmyohmyohmyohmy!
well bugger me blue and sideways, what can i say!!!
all this was such a wonderful and unexpected surprise for me! i woke up. got out of bed. dragged a comb across my head... even though there's nothing left upstairs to drag - it was just that kind of laughably routine morning! after i'd trundled into work and sat down and booted up and strapped in, i logged onto LJ and oh my!!! SHAMOOSHGAHWIZZBAMMERS!!! a giant domino puffpie of love crumbed goodness right there, !SPLAT!, there ya go, straight in the face!! and far away a tiny voice came trailing off the wind... 'there ya fool! how's that?! ... now SHUDDUP and get the hell on with living why dont ya!!!'
hehehehehe!!! the funny thing was that as i started reading it i thought 'oh i wonder who she's talking about' then as i read some more i started to think 'hey! it could be you ya know....' then it got to 'custard brain' and i thought 'oh jumping christs alive!!!'... but the really daft thing? from that point on i started to read it with a sense of dread, i was just waiting for a big capitalized 'BUT...' to arrive and then the whole thing would come tumbling down, taking me with it, burying me alive. but it didnt! and when i got to the end, the first thing i did was look around the office and after only seeing blurry shaped things seemingly pointing vaguely toward me i thought 'ive got to get out of here!' so i got up and practically ran to the mens toilets, got in, locked the door, sat down and began to try to work out just why i felt like id swallowed a giant marshmallowed volcano in full bloom! hahahahahhaa!!!!
then i spent the rest of the day high as a kite beaming out smiles to strangers and trying desperately to pluck out of the sky around me the words that would express how i felt and help me to try to even just begin to return a *snazzle* of the joy this has brought me but, well, its nearly 9pm now and still i really cant... all i can simply say is that i think this girl is the most amazingly heartwarming, alive, joyous and outstandingly and gloriously *humane* bundle of waltzing life that ive ever met! she seems to have this most treasured of gifts, able to make everyone she comes into contact with feel special, like they're the most important person in the world... and it takes the brightest shining stars of all to illuminate faces like that.
sorry to be a disappointment here folks but i just want to quietly and without fanfare offer from the bottom of my most cliched of hearts the greatest lovefelt thankyou ever.
they say all the world's a stage...
this girl brings the house down everytime.
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I know you'll understand exactly what I mean when I say...
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Well Said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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a/s/l
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