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First Crush: A boy named Matt in third grade. Cute little bad boy with long hair. He brought a pocketknife to school and I told my dad. He hated me after that for at least a week. Then he gave me a valentine.

Second Crush: A guy named Dennis Pitts who was the roller rink king. He was in high school. I was in fifth grade. He never knew I existed.

First Girl Kiss: My best friend Adela in sixth grade. We were practicing for "real" kisses.

First Boy Kiss: A boy named Lance in sixth grade...Adela was a much better kisser than him.

Best Teacher: My fourth grade teacher, Mr. Andersen. He never made me feel stupid for being smart.

First Real Date: Sadie Hawkins Dance when I was 15. The guy tried to feel me up and I punched him in the stomach so hard he puked...didn't get asked out again that year.

Person Who Makes Me Sad: My brother--the posterboy for drugs, alcohol and wasted potential.

Favorite Hat: An old Panama hat that belonged to my mother.

No Big Surprise: I was a drama/debate geek in high school.

Biggest Pet Peeve: Televangelists.

Sporty Thing I'm Good At: Waterskiing

No Talent For: Tuning a guitar.

I Could Have Been a Great: Wife...several times, like Zsa Zsa or Liz.

Coolest Celebrity I Ever Met: Cesar Romero--a consumate, charming gentleman.

Biggest Heartbreak: My family basically ceasing to exist after my grandmother died.

Movie I Watch To Laugh: "The Party" with Peter Sellars

Favorite Detective: Jules de Grandin

Marriage Proposals Received: Five

Marriage Proposals Accepted: None

Bugs I Hate: Scorpions

Worst Thing I've Ever Seen: Murdered children (part of my job sometimes--wish like hell it wasn't)

I Never Miss: The Wizard of Oz, It's a Wonderful Life, and the finals of the World Series

Favorite Indulgences: Ebay, The Weekly World News, bubblebaths, painting my toenails

Sounds Disgusting/Tastes Great: Chili Cheese Fritos and cream cheese sandwich

Favorite Sound: My kids laughing

Favorite Candy: Red Hots and Hershey's Kisses

I Go Out of My Way to Keep Up With: My old friends and sumo wrestling stats

Something I Should Do More Often: Clean house

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

First Crush: My English teacher when I was 7

Second Crush: The prettiest girl in school at 7 1/3 when I realised my English teacher was unattainable

First Girl Kiss: The prettiest girl in school

First Boy Kiss: Lord knows, no tongues though, ever.

Best Teacher: Abdul (Mr.Jones) my form tutor.

First Real Date: Never had one.

Person Who Makes Me Sad: My mother.

Favourite Hat: I don't own one.

No Big Surprise: People mistake me for a girl.

Biggest Pet Peeve: People who throw chewing gum on the floor because I always step on it, always.

Sporty Thing I'm Good At: Rugby

No Talent For: Giving birth.

I Could Have Been a Great: Woman.

Coolest Celebrity I Ever Met: Julian Cope - Cool Drude

Biggest Heartbreak: My Mother.

Movie I Watch To Laugh: Ishtar

Favourite Detective: Inspector Morse

Marriage Proposals Received: 2

Marriage Proposals Accepted: None

Bugs I Hate: Bees, wasps, hornets.

Worst Thing I've Ever Seen: Ishtar

I Never Miss: The toilet bowl.

Favourite Indulgences: Writing, Tea, Sun Dried Tomatoes In Olive Oil.

Sounds Disgusting/Tastes Great: I don't know of anything I can put here.

Favourite Sound: 'Daddy'

Favourite Candy: Staton

I Go Out of My Way to Keep Up With: My correspondence

Something I Should Do More Often: Decide against filling in questionnaires

I'm sure we could all say a lot of things about you, but "boring" would hardly be one of them, o' great flowbee prophet. ; )

flowbee with you.

On another note, as part of my plan to indoctrinate the minds of just about anybody I can find into the following of verianism and associated flowbee produce that I can sell as religious parephenalia, I had some poems accepted for a new zine. Which was nice. Actually, the person running it is very nice also.

Wow! Wow! And Wow! Published and published again!! That's wonderful news! : )

Now that's one of the most interesting question/answer thingies I have ever read!

Born out of boredom and nothing better to write, but thanks! : )

Once I was on the phone with a beautiful young woman. During the conversation we had then, I was finally coming to realize that she was ready to break off our relationship; there were subtle things... I was pretty naive or I would have known long before. We'd been going out for three years and were best friends. It was hard. Anyway, not a moment after hanging up that evening, a scorpion dropped from the ceiling and stung me on my little toe. The next time I saw my girlfriend, she handed me a little green rubber scorpion that some little kid had made with some weird toy kit. I hadn't even told her... To top it off, my astrological sign is Scorpio. After all that, I'm still not superstitious. Some of my friends think I'm an idiot for not seeing the significance of such things. Huh? Sure as hell don't like scorpions though... Once I met a woman who was studying biology and had this idea that arachnids might not be life forms indigenous to the earth. I asked her if she'd been watching any science fiction movies. Maybe it's true? I got a book on my shelf here in which the author shows some coincidental data that shows a correlation between viral outbreaks and meteor showers; it's called "Viruses from Space". Sometimes life is weird. You gotta be entertained by it all or you'll go crazy.

Rey

Ha! I hate scorpions on the ceilings!!! I didn't even know that they could do that until a couple of years ago. They creeeeeeeeep me out. I live out in the country, so they invade my house when it's hot. I've become this countrified Xena Warrior Princess scorpion killer. I've never been stung by one, but I'm sure my turn is coming. Summers turn me into a paranoid maniac...I'm always looking all over the house, checking the ceilings, shaking out the bedsheets...all with this awful "you can run but you can't hide" feeling. Ick!!

p.s. my aversion for the bug/monster does not extend to scorpio people : )

Makes me shiver just thinking about it... :-u|

In the closet by my kitchen is big pair of pliers. I call them my Scorpion Pliers. From time to time scorpions can be found sneaking up and down the walls, like you say, during the summer. What's distressing is that you know they crawl around on the floor, and with carpet you just won?t see them. But when they go up the walls you can, so I grab them by the tail, disabling their stinger so if they get loose they can?t sting me. Yikes!
Once I found a big tarantula in the garage, which was actually kind of docile and fun. I put it in a jar, studied it a little, then set it free in the woods behind my house (soon to be 'developed': An ocean of people, non indigenous grasses, concrete skin over everything, big wooden boxes for the people?) Anyway, for some reason fuzzy things aren?t so menacing; I wonder why? Lizards, anole and salamanders hang out around my porch and the garage door; they?re okay too; eat bugs? Come to think of it, there's a tiny species of fuzzy black jumping spider with a white patch on their back. They're kind of animated as compared to other spiders so I leave them alone, or at least kick them out of the house and back on to the porch. Maybe there are okay or creepy arachnids, just like people? :-\

Rey

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