Just wanted to sort of somberly say that I think, if similar for me, I'd probably do as you, too.
I've spent my recent years struggling with my own inner conflicts about my family. Understanding/fighting with my own choices, perspectives, etc. What is important or relevant to me is not necessarily someone else's priority. To have knowledge (especially of something I would consider important, or shattering) also means sometimes having the responsibility to consider the impact and relevance of it being shared.
And an important kernel: even if it "proves" something I've always felt is right or truth, albeit painful, is it really vital that it be done to assert my own pride and control over others? The news may devastate some; it may cause conflict. But what purpose will it serve the whole other than to serve my own sense of pride and righteousness. Will it provide healing, though? Also is it "my" secret to share, etc.? It's not really "my" own secret and it also serves really little purpose as it is a secret that preceded all of us now living.
Me, perhaps, I think it's good enough that *I* know about it, if it's important to me. Deliberately sharing it with others (especially those that could be seriously affected by it), is something else. And once revealed, it cannot be taken back except by denial.
For me, though, I think the main point is whether such a secret will give some sort of healing, wholeness, or not. Or if there's such a horrible secret that has been hidden that it would truly serve the world by the timing of it's open revelation and by who it is revealed to.
FYI: I have many personal assumptions and guesses about my own family, but no evidence whatsoever. I'm sure, though, the truth is always stranger and more horrible - or impactful - than even what my imagination tells me.
I wish you much peace in this knowledge you've gained as well as much courage with however you and your family (that knows) deals with it as well.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Re: Payback's a Bitch
Date: 2008-02-09 04:52 pm (UTC)I've spent my recent years struggling with my own inner conflicts about my family. Understanding/fighting with my own choices, perspectives, etc. What is important or relevant to me is not necessarily someone else's priority. To have knowledge (especially of something I would consider important, or shattering) also means sometimes having the responsibility to consider the impact and relevance of it being shared.
And an important kernel: even if it "proves" something I've always felt is right or truth, albeit painful, is it really vital that it be done to assert my own pride and control over others? The news may devastate some; it may cause conflict. But what purpose will it serve the whole other than to serve my own sense of pride and righteousness. Will it provide healing, though? Also is it "my" secret to share, etc.? It's not really "my" own secret and it also serves really little purpose as it is a secret that preceded all of us now living.
Me, perhaps, I think it's good enough that *I* know about it, if it's important to me. Deliberately sharing it with others (especially those that could be seriously affected by it), is something else. And once revealed, it cannot be taken back except by denial.
For me, though, I think the main point is whether such a secret will give some sort of healing, wholeness, or not. Or if there's such a horrible secret that has been hidden that it would truly serve the world by the timing of it's open revelation and by who it is revealed to.
FYI: I have many personal assumptions and guesses about my own family, but no evidence whatsoever. I'm sure, though, the truth is always stranger and more horrible - or impactful - than even what my imagination tells me.
I wish you much peace in this knowledge you've gained as well as much courage with however you and your family (that knows) deals with it as well.